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Loneliness Vs Solitude




Picture this: you are walking in the park with no one but your thoughts to accompany you. You look around you; take a deep breath. Would you term this as being lonely or being in solitude? The answer may surprise you. While most people, if they do not know, would use the two terms as synonyms, there is more to it than what meets the eye.

Are you comfortable being in this place right here is what would answer your question. Have you ever felt out of place in a room of people?  Do not worry, we have all been there. This is loneliness. The state when not even all the people are enough for you or what you are looking for. Solitude on the other hand is that state where you are by yourself but you are perfectly fine being so. You are taking in everything, all around you. You are at peace. Of the two terms, solitude definitely sounds like the better one and one that you would like to feel. But here’s the catch: you would need both loneliness and solitude in life.

This reminds me of something I read long ago in middle school. It is an excerpt from a series that I used to read called ‘so little time’.

Solitude is one thing,
Loneliness is another.
Solitude is when I’m walking along the beach
And I’m happy just breathing and being.
Loneliness is when not even the beach
Can comfort me or keep me company
Still, it’s the loneliness that makes me grow
While it’s the solitude that keeps me whole.

We all need a little privacy at times, the space where we are absolutely free to do what we want, be what we want to be; not judged, unseen. This is exactly what solitude gives you an opportunity of. But it doesn’t mean that there are not going to be days when you feel alone in the worst state; days when you don’t feel good about yourselves; days when you don’t know where you are heading in life and days when you feel no one would understand and you and it is not even worth trying. But you know what? It is okay. We all have those bad days. But it’s a bad day, not a bad life. And how we rise and perceive such days is what will strengthen us.

Unless you have those days where you feel sad and hollow, how else are you going to appreciate all those days where you are happy and grateful? It is like that old saying that goes: everybody wants happiness, nobody wants pain but you can’t have a rainbow without a little rain. Life is a combination of both the happy moments and sad moments. Of course we would wish we’d get more of the happy days, we all do, but unless you have those broken moments, you will never value those where you feel content. 

Comments

  1. Well observed and written. I like the point on value of loneliness and agree on solitude.

    Regarding solitude, my observation and lessons I learned from MBTI is that extroverts will feel loneliness more often and introverts will want more solitude. Words extrovert and introverts can be misunderstood (as in one being good and other bad). Extroverts are people who gain energy by being with people and introverts are people who gain energy in solitude. But a person is not always an extrovert or introvert. It is more a spectrum of extroversion vs introversion and where a person generally prefers to be in.

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  2. And keep on writing 'little' sister ;-)

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